She is competing with a memory

If the link dies, listen to Joni Mitchell Both sides now

 Just finished Graeme Simsion's "The best of Adam Sharp". To say I find myself in the main character and his story (an old love from 22 years before pops up in his email) is an understatement. While what happens afterwards will be far from my reality at least, some of his thoughts are my own as well. 

  First of all, he feels that even talking to his former lover is a form of affair because he feels it needs to be kept secret from his current partner. 

  Second, how certain songs punctuated their story and where shortcuts to those memories they had together. Happy to hear I did that 10 years before the book came out. 

Most important though, it's his realisation that his current partner is fighting against a memory. The Angela in his mind is 23, the real one is 45 and has 3 kids.. You can't fight a memory. Or you shouldn't at least. It's good to have memories, but they don't keep you warm at night, they don't help you when you're sick. Hopefully I find a way to tactfully explain this to mine.